I’m currently on two themed binges of art.

The first is a music binge: I’ve been listening to the Juliana Theory non-stop. A few months ago, they released their very last album as a band, Deadbeat Sweetheartbeat. It’s self-described as an album of bitter, harsh goodbyes.

The utter disdain of the words matched with some very honest talent is helping me to cope. It’s good to hear that someone else has been through a similar churn, and feels something so utter and raw that it carries them through an entire album.

I’m sure a thousand more pained poets have mentioned this before, but in case you’re young: any method you try of limiting your sadness only works if you can at least equally limit your joy. Mostly squeeze your eyes shut and only pry them open for navigation. What everybody says is right – time does make loss bearable, but they forgot the part about global numbness.

I’m quoting myself now, from my g-s days: absence makes the heart grow blander.

The second is a binge of movies directed by Ang Lee. Two of my favorite love stories are by him: Brokeback Mountain and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. Both are about love destroyed by societal expectations and self-doubt.

Talk about an active audience, heh. I’m listening and watching to see if I can catch the mistakes that make me inevitably invisible.